Kindness is the language that the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
Mark Twain
I have always been the kind of person who strives to show kindness to others. I love to help and try to always be a person that others can lean on. I think it is something that began in me at a very young age. Kindness was something that I was able to offer to others and even though I have always been a quiet person, kindness never required volume or confidence. Being kind, showing kindness and helping others is something that is not only important for my life but it is something that I have always tried to teach my kids.
My boys have giant hearts and I am so proud of how kind they are to others. They have spent time volunteering at food banks, soup kitchens, yard work for elderly, shopping for those who are home bound and even simple little acts of kindness such as holding open a door or changing someone’s tire. Being kind is second nature to them and I can’t ask for more!
As much as I aim to be kind and will happily dish it out, I confess I am TERRIBLE at accepting kindness or help in return. I think the slightly stubborn part of me (hmm that may be an understatement) is quick to take on the response of “I am fine, I can do it all” when in reality I can’t. I will not forget the first time I can really remember receiving an act of kindness that came as an anonymous surprise which meant it was something I not only couldn’t control but I also couldn’t even say thank you!
It was Christmas time in 1997 and it was going to be our first Christmas as just the 3 of us. Chris was 7 and Z had just turned 3, I was suddenly a single mom on a preschool salary and unfortunately no child support. I wasn’t sure how to continue to afford the rent or purchase food and at the same time it was Christmas time and they were just kids. The boys were innocent bystanders in this mess and they had already been through so much, were they now also going to have to miss out on stockings and Santa Claus? All of these worries were so big on my heart back then but I didn’t see how to make things better.
Then one day, things began to change. I believe it was just a couple of weeks before Christmas and I found an envelope under the windshield wiper on my car. Inside was money, just enough to cover my shortage for rent that month. On the front of the envelope was a note that said something to the effect of from your angels. I was shocked, surprised and at a loss as I hadn’t told anyone (other than the people we had stayed with for a bit) that we were on our own and I certainly didn’t share with anyone about the financial situation I was in. Imagine my surprise when a 2nd envelope appeared followed by a 3rd. Each time the money was exactly how much we needed for groceries or the utilities. Our angels (and I think there were a few as the writing changed) came just at that moment we needed it most. I was, and still am today, so very grateful that we had what we needed and I couldn’t imagine anything else. Of course what to do about Christmas presents and Santa was still an issue but I again didn’t see a solution and I was prepared to talk to my guys about it all and I knew they would be disappointed but they would be okay.
It was on Christmas Eve that I found something I wasn’t expecting on my front porch. That morning, next to the doormat, was a big black garbage bag and what was inside had me overwhelmed. Inside that bag there was play doh, crayons, matchbox cars, coloring books and so many other little toys and stocking stuffers…. Santa had indeed come to our house! That Christmas we received so much more than the physical and monetary gift, that Christmas we received the lesson of kindness and acceptance. I must admit the receiving without the ability to repay, say thank you, do something was incredibly frustrating for me but I think it was the beginning of a lesson that I am still working learning.
Here we are, 24 years later, and I am still overwhelmed with the kindness that was shown to a little family who just needed some support. That year we learned something that we wouldn’t come to understand for many years (see my blog “Mom, God Said..”) we learned a hand’s on example of Galatians 6:2 “Carry each other’s burdens and so you will fulfill the law of Christ.” I wonder if our special angels realize the impact they made on my little family or the ripple they created and continues on today.